Boobies Near Midnight

It's 11:30 at night which for me feels like 3am... what can i say i like to go to bed early... any who- i can't sleep and i thought it might help if i do the 'write down your thoughts' thing. However, a lot of the things that are keeping me from sleeping are too heavy and draining to write about right now. I would rather pretend they don't exist... at least for tonight and focus on the one that makes me laugh: my chest. That's right, i would like to write a blog post about my ta-tas. I highly doubt that i have any male readers, but if there are this is your cue to move on... same goes for family i suppose.

One of the things that keeps me awake nightly is trying to find a position i am comfortable in without squishing my chest. For those who were lucky when pregnant, or you just haven't experienced it yet- your chest gets extremely sore and uncomfortable when those hormones hit. Imagine if you will, that they feel like they are being stretched from your body and every time you move you feel every cell in your chest shift and lets just say it doesn't feel good. At all.

I was blessed with a larger than most chest when i was young... 6th grade as my mom likes to remind me. Having a large chest at a young age is a blessing and a curse. What did Spiderman's uncle tell him- "With great power comes great responsibility" or something like that... don't worry- i don't take the powers of my nice rack that seriously, but there is some truth to it. Lets go over the pros and cons shall we:

Pros:                                                        
Instant popularity with boys                 
Better fitting clothes
Cuter bras
Confidence
Free stuff

Cons:
Instant 'slut' title from other girls - can't all our cup sizes just get along?
Instant 'she's trying to steal my boyfriend' - I wasn't (Just FYI)
Instant shame whenever there is a photo of you picking something up or leaning into a photo
Instant jealousy from people who pay full price

I secretly loved my chest, but if you admit that in high school then you basically accept the title of slut, and since they did most of the talking themselves, when ever someone would mention how 'well porportioned' i was i would play the 'what? your crazy!' card and remind them that i was only a B cup. I got teased a lot that no matter what style of shirt i wore my girls were on display. I even had a phase where i would only wear t-shirts and Polo's to try to detract attention... but that seemed to only attract more attention (it probably didn't help that while my neck line was conservative they were skin tight everywhere else lol). Not until my 20's did i find out from a very nice lady at Nordstroms that i was in fact a DD and had been living my life in an uncomfortable B for no reason other than to tell people they were crazy. That trip was eye opening, back pain relieving and expensive ;)

I digress...

As my pregnancy continues so has my bust size. I read in all the books that i would probably go up a cup or so but i have already out grown all of my DD's and it will only be a short time that i outgrow the bras my mom has given me- she's pretty large too but she cuts out all the tags so i have no idea what size I've been wearing. I read that a sports bra can help with comfort so i went and got a couple Larges... only to outgrow them a few weeks later. I went and got some XL's (which is really the only time I've ever been happy about having to buy that size- well that and the fact i shop in the kids sections still... i digress again... damn sleepless brain!)

Between the larger bras and sports bras whenever i wear them i feel this strange pressure right under my chest but above my stomach... i thought it was heart burn until i took off whatever i was wearing and it went away. I think the things are just too damn heavy- even my husband has said they are rounder and heavier- for the record we were applying stretch mark creme while making this discovery so get your mind out of the gutter!

So now i try not to wear anything and just deal with the milked cow sensation instead, because at least when i don't move it doesn't hurt. I will admit, while i was terrified that they would keep growing, even i am impressed when i catch a glimpse of them... but seriously... how big are these things going to get???

I have officially cleared my head of some strange and funny (to me) dialogue, so maybe now i can try to get some sleep...