Forcefeeding

I have always been a fairly independent thinker. I can say with 100% honesty that has not always been the case. When i was younger i obsessed about that other people thought so most of the time i didn't voice my opinion, even if i was offended by someone Else's. I thought it was easier to keep the peace and keep it to myself, while making a mental note not to bring up that subject again.

When i met my husband, all that changed. He actually encouraged me to say what i thought, and because i wanted to please him i would tell him that i really thought and then cringe while i waited for his response. People joke all the time that men are predictable, and my husband is no exception. I didn't know what to expect from him, but i was surprised to find that he has always valued my opinion, even if it is different than his. Luckily, our opinions don't differ much, so it feels good to finally have that freedom to say what i think or what I'm going through and know that he will always understand. The amount of people i have found with this ability, are fewer than i can count on my hand, but when i find them i don't ever let them go. There is nothing more valuable to me in a friendship than this quality. I think that's why i believe with all my heart that my husband, is my absolute best friend in the entire world.

Now we move on to everyone else. I noticed it when i was getting married that everyone wanted to give me their opinion, and lets face it, i didn't want it. I am a girl yes, but i am also an event planner by trade so i had my wedding pretty much planned out from the moment i figured out Kevin and i were playing for keeps. I didn't want help, i just wanted it done the way we had planned for it. I learned a lot of ways to get out of these types of conversations where i would be force fed and told what i supposedly 'wanted'.

I am finding out more and more now that i am expecting our first child, that people are even MORE aggressive with the information they want to shove down your throat. It is harder to evade these people because i find myself cornered most of the time, and find that its easier to just agree with them so they leave me alone. I don't know if its because its my first baby, or if people will be like this forever, but its driving me absolutely crazy- and with my hormones already out of whack I'm finding it harder and harder not to verbally bitch slap these people that only want to tell me the horrible things that could happen to me. I was talking to my mother in law about this over dinner last night and she helped me figure it out: it is plain and simple: it doesn't help to hear these things, especially if I'm not at the place where it matters to hear it yet.

I don't want your advise, unless i ask for it. I am a first time mom, I'm sure i will have questions, but can you please wait until I'm ready to know? I have found great help from the people i feel comfortable asking questions to. However, hearing about how horrible this and that can be from people i didn't ask... let me tell you a secret: your only making yourself feel better by 'letting me know', your NOT helping! I am getting more and more afraid, that this will only get worse when i actually have the baby and everyone is going to tell me how to raise it, discipline it, feed it ect. I don't go into anything unprepared, and i definitely wont go into being a mom without doing as much research as i can and with my husband and i making our OWN decisions about it. It just simply won't happen.

I find it strange too, the amount of people who think they're entitled to know every detail that is going on with my body. I don't want to talk to you about my BM's... i don't want to talk to you about my birth plan, (because you'll only try to 1. tell me I'm crazy or 2. force what you did on me). If i offer things up then fine, lets talk about it but lets get one thing clear: i DO NOT want to be force fed your horror story! I think the other thing that is baffling to me is the amount of people who think they should be with me when the baby is coming, or who think they are entitled to a phone call when i go into delivery. Seriously!? I cant apologize for the fact that i will have BETTER THINGS GOING ON then remember to shoot you a text with 'im in labor ;)'. The only person that is going to be with me and my child is my husband, our parents will get the calls that its going on but that's it... they can call whoever they want, but if anyone thinks they are going to get in on my lady business is just outright crazy!!!

I think we've been over this before, if its not my idea... I'm usually not into it. Granted the only other opinion in this world i truly care about is my husbands and we are on the same page. There is no way he is letting anyone in the delivery room, letting anyone talk to me about all the things that can go wrong (because he is the one stuck calming me down) and he doesn't care what anyone Else's opinion is. Its ours. The baby, is OURS, and what we do with it is up to us, so here is our message to the universe: back the heck off already! geepers!!!!

OK, rantings of a hormonal pregnant woman are over. PS if you see the lady that pissed me off at the gas station still standing there with her jaw dropped, tell her i said hi.

Have an fantastic non-force fed day!