Breast feeding for Dummies

Breast feeding... of all the things I willingly talk about this is one of the hardest for me to actually bring up. Blunt honesty is usually my forte, but for some reason I have a hard time sharing when it comes to breast feeding. I'm finding that I'm not as mature as I thought I was, and get embarrassed when talking about my chest and my breast feeding journey. Mainly because I have to virtually describe my boobs for you to understand my nursing troubles. I was really up in the air about nursing at all throughout my pregnancy but I'm glad that I ultimately decided to do it, I just wish someone (or my books for that matter) had told me the truth or given me a realistic glance into what my chest would be going through. So, although it makes me a little uncomfortable to put it all out there- literally and figuratively- let me be the one to give you the honest story on breast feeding. I'll warn you ahead of time, this is a long one so I've broken it up into topics... feel free to skip around.

FREE Breast Pump
This is the most valuable information I learned and must pass it on so more people can take advantage of it. Most insurance companies 100% cover the cost of your breast pump. We were given a hand-held single pump by a friend who didn't end up using hers (never take a used one) but the lactation consultant told me I would need an electric one. Well, they're pretty expensive so I wasn't going to get one until a friend told me about insurance covering them. You have to do a little extra work- calling your insurance to get the supplier info, placing the order, and the long waiting game that comes along with using insurance but it is totally worth it. I could only choose from 2 models but I had done a little research and asked for the one closest to the Madela model. It took about 2 weeks to ship, so place your order before the baby comes. I didn't know about this until after Averie was born so I had to rent one from the hospital but it was less than $25 for 2 weeks... no biggie.

Lactation Consultants
I'm not one to whip out my boobs for anyone but as soon as Averie was born I didn't care who was in the room and who was putting their hands on me to help me nurse her. Really, all modesty went out the window the minute I checked into the hospital. Don't be afraid to get all the help and ask all the questions you may have while still in the hospital because once you check out help is harder to come by. There is a group called the Le Leche League but in my opinion they are very aggressive when it comes to breast feeding and I found they rarely answer my actual question and spend more time explaining to me why I have to continue breast feeding (something I wasn't questioning in the first place) It stinks that in a world where doctors really push the benefits of breast feeding that insurance covers breast pumps but NOT a lactation consultant post pardum.

I call BS!
Everyone in the medical field will tell you that breast feeding isn't supposed to hurt... BULL SHIT! Especially for the first timers- it does! I don't care who tells you it doesn't.. it does. It sucks. I was actually at the point where I was dreading each feeding. It is incredibly painful even if the baby is latched on correctly because your nipples aren't used to be stimulated 12 times a day for hours at a time. There are times when she is unlatching and inadvertently gives me a purple-nurple. I still would have nursed, but I wish someone would have just told me it hurts so I knew what to expect. What you don't want to do is listen to mom's and grandma's that will tell you to 'toughen up' your nipples ahead of time. It makes the pain worse- in fact all you really want to do to your nipples is wash them with warm water and that's it... no soap, no creams, no toughening... they will do what they are supposed to on their own (and yes, it's going to hurt at first).

Ok this is the part that makes me really uncomfortable but it could help someone else with the same problem. I have a really large chest and apparently I have flat nipples. I never knew I had flat nipples because they were always... well lets just say they did what they were supposed to when they were supposed to so I never thought about their shape. I guess most women's nipples are longer and thicker (someone told me theirs closely resembled a pool que lol) and those women have a much easier time breast feeding. What this meant for me is I had to rely more on non-traditional positioning of the baby (the football hold and laying on my side) and I have to hand express some milk before each feeding so she doesn't have any issues latching on. I wanted to quit every day but I didnt... I had to tell myself to take it one day at a time otherwise I would have quit counting down the first 6 weeks.

I am told establishing a nursing relationship takes about 6 weeks for first timers. Babies are born ready to suck, but without knowledge on how to nurse so women with my challenges take a little more manipulating before a proper latch can happen. Luckily, in only 4 weeks Averie and I have gotten into a pretty good routine but it was extremely rough leading up to that point and sometimes it still is. Add in the fact that Averie was in the SCN for 6 days with bottle feedings in the beginning I had a lot working against me. The first time they let me nurse her in the SCN she got a bad latch and caused some raised milk ducts which was very painful... when it finally healed I developed a 'crack' in my nipple (this is common so pay attention so this doesn't happen to you). The crack ended up opening and became very very painful. So painful that I still can't nurse her on that side- it's been a few weeks- but it's finally on the mend. What I didn't know is after each feeding if you hand express some milk and rub it on that nipple, then let it air dry- it can prevent all these complications. So, let my pain be a learning opportunity for you! I am terrified of ending up with lopsided boobs from her nursing on one side so I make sure to pump the other side after each feeding.

Baby Bonding
I didn't feel that instantaneous bond to my baby once she started nursing. I did feel it the moment she came out but I kept hearing from everyone and books that I would feel a special connection to her once she started nursing. For many women, this is their favorite part of having a newborn. I didn't experience that feeling, at least not surrounding feedings. Maybe it was because of her having bottles right away in the SCN, or because of all the complications with what i now lovingly call my 'bum nip' but I just didn't have that ah-ha moment. I did get ridiculously excited the first time she successfully latched that I made my husband take pictures. Yes, I am that crazy mom. There are things I do love about nursing, I'm not sure if I'll be able to describe them well but I will try. I love listening to her nurse... that little gulping noise she makes at the beginning for some reason makes me smile. It's just the cutest little noise that lets me know she's getting what she needs and it makes me proud. I love the face she makes immediately after she unlatches. It's kind of like a grumpy pouty face where her lower lip comes up and covers her top lip and her eyebrows are so expressive. I haven't taken a picture I can post because my boob is usually out haha. She doesn't make it with a bottle, just after nursing from me... and I love it.

Things I Didn't Know...
We've been living with my family for a year now and it is great having extra hands when I need them. The thing I didn't anticipate was how lonely breast feeding could be even with a house full of people. Because the baby was nursing every 1 1/2 hours in the beginning and I had to pump the other side for a minimum of 20 minutes I spend most of my time alone with the baby in my room with the door closed. I have a modesty cover but I'm not comfortable using it yet because we are still perfecting our latch. I've used it once at family's house but I still had to go into another room. I'm hoping to become more confident as times goes on so I don't have to be stuck at home all the time. It's hard to do anything when she nurses for over 30 minutes each time and then I have to pump for 20... by the time I take a minute to eat or use the rest room it's time to start all over again. With the amount of time I spend topless, we definitely need our own place next time.

Bouncing from boob to bottle is supposed to be a no-no. I didn't have a choice in the beginning. I only had Averie with me for the first 13 hours of her life and she did not latch on at all the first time the nurses had me feed her. I use the word feed lightly because your milk doesn't come in for about 4-5 days after birth (something else I didn't know). They had to give her bottles in the SCN and I made my concerns known but it really was what was best for her in the beginning. They could feed her a bottle under the bili lights without compromising her level of care. As soon as they allowed I started nursing, but it was rough so they ended up supplementing with formula or the small amount of milk i pumped after each feeding. I actually find this a blessing because now she can transition from my chest to a bottle and back again.

The original plan was to nurse exclusively but I had to adapt, and it turned out to be a blessing. It allows for me to get some extra sleep in the middle of the night when my husband gets up to give her a feeding. They get some bonding time and I get extra sleep... it's a win/win. I keep reading that you're not supposed to introduce a pacifier or a bottle until the nursing relationship is well established. However, if we have more kids I'm going to keep the same routine: 1-2 bottle feedings in a 24 hour period so I can give my chest a break or run errands during a feeding. It makes me feel like I have some control instead of a feeding machine.

Cluster Feedings
I didn't even know these existed until a few weeks ago. Right before she hit 2 weeks she wanted to eat literally every hour on the dot. I thought there was something wrong with my milk supply until I did some research and found out that was a regular growth-spurt interval. At her 2 week checkup I saw all that feeding had payed off.. she grew over an inch and a half and put on 10 ounces. it made the insanity, and the very sore nipples all worth it. She's 4 weeks today and she was back to cluster feeding all last week so I'm thinking there's another growth spurt in the works.

Making Milk
Enhancing milk supply is something you can actually do. You have to be careful not to do too much too soon though because you can cause yourself to become engorged which hurts... a lot. Having a beer can actually help because of the brewer's yeast in it. It also helps you to relax which helps your milk let down. A friend of mine made me some fenugreek cookies while Averie was in the SCN which helped a lot since I pumped every 2 hours just to bring her something of mine to eat at each feeding. I'm at a point now where I'll need to help myself produce more milk again because of my bum nip... she's completely draining the good side and is hungry about an hour later. All will be fixed once I can nurse on both sides but I'll have to help my body along in the mean time.

Will I Do It All Again?
Breast milk really is the best thing for her, and if I had to do it all over again with another baby I wouldn't hesitate. Pain and all it's completely worth it. Even though I didn't experience what movies and books told me I would, I wouldn't change a thing. Actually... I'll definitely make sure to express milk at the end of each feeding and air dry EVERY time haha!