Although i have no idea what that movie is about, i liked the title so i stole it for this post. I am hoping to gain some advice on what the best system is to manage our two lives (and dollars) coming into one.
Before we got married we had separate accounts and we were always pulling cash out to give to the other to balance our bills or outings. When we decided to move in together we started taking turns paying certain bills, and eventually fell into the regular routine of each of us taking care of the same bills and it all evened out perfectly.
When we got engaged we decided to open a joint savings account for the wedding, and we had automatic transfers from our separate account going into the savings account that we happily referred to as our fun money. Unfortunately, now that we live on our own we are transferring money in and out of that account almost daily, which apparently is a problem for our bank.
About a month ago, Kevin messed up big time with out of our bills, and it really screwed us over. I was absolutely and insanely mad about the whole situation, feeling like if i wanted it done right i should do it myself. However, i don't have the freaking time to do it myself, so i started to get upset that i couldn't count on my husband to take care of it when i already had so much on my plate. I spent about a week absolutely furious with him, and he spent that entire week trying to make it up to me. Of course he never meant to mess up, and these things happen, but at the time i just felt like i had had enough when it came to money and i was sick of talking about it.
Then i realized (after i was done being mad of course) that i don't want money to be a thing that i get upset about with my husband. I don't want it to be one of the things we fight about, and until that time, it had stayed out of the things we ever had to have conversations about. So, we are looking to change that. I want to get something straight, we are by no means 'rollin in dough' but we aren't scraping the bottom of the barrel (most of the time) we live somewhere in the middle, occasionally with a little extra and sometimes figuring out which bills will be paid late. So how do you manage it?
I have gotten the advice that we should just close our separate accounts and only have a joint- but we each spend a lot of time making sure our own accounts stay current that it kind of freaks me out to have 2 people spending from the same account at the same time. On the other hand, having to transfer back and forth is no way to manage successfully either...
So i put it out there to all of you, what is working for you and what isn't? Help a newlywed out ;)
We do joint checking and savings. Always talk about money together and balance together so you both know what's going on. My husband pays the bills now. I was doing it for awhile but he's much better at keeping track! :)
ReplyDeleteI think as long as you guys talk about purchases together and don't keep secrets about money from each other, you'll be fine! :)
For my sister and husband, they kept their individual accounts opened to use for individual needs (make up, clothes, pedis/manis, WOW subscription, etc) and used the joint account to pay bills. I think they allowed about $300 a month or so for personal use? I don't recall the $ amount but it did work for them after having a similar conundrum occur. Hope this helps! <3 you
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